This heat is kicking our tails. I love it hot, but God damn, it's hot! It's burnin' up shit and taxing my electronics. And we are exhausted. Rashawn Brazell's murder and the subsequent lull of details about the story might have something to do with that, but I look around and see people hard at work creating their realities. That's already enough to make anyone sit down and take a breath. But sometimes, it's not even about all that. Sometimes you just want to do something else, unapologetically. So, especially you two, I hope life gives you some more of what you're looking for in those other spaces away from blogging.
As for me, like Kenyon said: "I am just gonna post all my shit on my blog." I'm going to contextualize that my own way with some pictures and words that may have some kind of meaning. Then again, they may not. Pardon me while I get instinctual ...
I need a man, true, but I've discovered that what I need more is a portable air conditioner! My computer fainted the other day and truly had me worried but she shouldn't have to live like this, up in this heat. So, I go up in Amazon and link to what I'd like only to be reminded of the LAST air conditioner that I bought. Yeah, and it's as fucked up as it sounds. *sigh* One day I'm going to have everything I need and I know this. I'm going to do be able to do things like pour honey for Oshun without having to worry about finding a sale or buying it generic. I'm going to give myself what I need and not have to worry about the fucking consequences.
I will have some very exciting news coming very soon. I still can't believe it myself, but it's real. And it's required some real sacrifice, but I think it will all work out. I'm grateful for having a job. It's the only way I could afford this camera. It gives me a regular check, it allows me to get medical advice and medications that most of the world can't afford. It allows me to sit up like I am now, in this neurosurgeon's office, awaiting my turn to discuss this bevy of MRI films. Still, I look forward to the day when I can have these things without having to subject myself to a constant barrage of European tourists beating up my brain about some dumb iPod shit. I look forward to the day when doing my own thing is enough - is more than enough.
That's why I've been going back and forth about this one photo competition, the Camera Club of New York's National Competition. It's only like $35 to consider 6 slides, but the slides themselves are going to cost me probably another $75. And I'm barely paying my rent this month. And did I mention how hot is was? But, then again, Sylvia Plachy is hot. And if she thinks I'm hot, well, I can use that later to do even more of what I love. And that's all I'm here to do. So, I don't know ... (UPDATE: I've decided not to do it. Definitely next year, though ...)
We need Daughters of Soul over here. True, Philippe and I did contemplate hijacking a plane to get to Spain later this month (because that's truly what it would take), but we need to have the energy of those women right here. So you, faithful reader, might be asking "How can I help?" Go get Sandra what she needs for her new daughter's arrival! If you want to see Daughters of Soul stay something European, fine, don't buy her shit. But if you want to see Sandra trade magical vocalistics with Simone, Lalah Hathaway, Nona Hendryx and Caron Wheeler AND a fierce band (and you KNOW she'll be bringing the FIERCE special guests, too - c'mon, it's Sandra!) then do what you gotta do. Shit! By the way, here's a link to their webcast for those of y'all who need proof.
And Maxwell, baby, I need you to make it so good. I need you to make it so good that all I have to do is see a capital M and I'd be repositioning a leaking dick all in my linens. I'd hear a reminiscent rhythm on my laptop or from one of the blind people tappng a stick and just freeze motionless, tweaking my left nipple, feeling my ass clutch and flex because I know you're right behind me with your tongue on my neck about to deliver what you know I need so bad. Because I know you make it hot, this Black Summer's Night, baby, I know you make it hot.
One day I’m going to have everything I need and I know this. I’m going to do be able to do things like pour honey for Oshun without having to worry about finding a sale or buying it generic. I’m going to give myself what I need and not have to worry about the fucking consequences.
I so feel you on that, man.
Ok, now I’m looking at that picture of you all at the top of the page. Donald, did you plan to make it so symmetrical? Gordon and Steven on the ends, both bald with goatees, contrasting skin tones. Next in Heru and Kevin, both with locs. Mervyn and Kenyon facing outward in opposite directions. Then Larry being Larry. Interesting composition, intentional or not.
I will send you some fog from the city that is notorious for being cold enough in June, July and August to wear a coat and snuggle under the covers without it being strange at all…but the fires rage outside the city as we need the attention.