You know, I don’t think I’ll ever stop wanting life to be an experience where everything is okay and comfortable and uncomplicated and full of opportunity and hope. Those wants juxtaposed with actually living a life in this world make for many moments of real confusion, hurt, frustration and more depression and disconnection than I’d care to admit.
It’s not even like shit waits for other shit to stop happening to start happening, you know what I mean? Everything’s concurrent and events usually don’t queue up neatly, one behind the other. All of my friends seem to be going through their own trials and tribulations while I begin an exciting new job. I’m leaving a difficult job just as it becomes easier and as its purpose becomes clearer to me. I have an idea for a fantastic website, but I can’t remember the last time I picked up my camera. My podcast series makes me want to DJ again, but I can’t remember the last time I picked up my camera. HRLM is almost over and I’m getting sales inquiries about those pieces, but I can’t remember the last time I picked up my camera. And we keep getting suckerpunched by white people. And this rain … sigh
Keith says in a recent post that “I can’t save anyone if I don’t save myself first.” In fact, that’s a core concept of this new website idea, only not so much framed in emergency as it’s framed in renewal. And I think that’s all I’m going to say about that!
It’s kinda corny, but the theme song from The Facts of Life is SO TRUE:
You take the good, you take the bad
You take them both and there you have
the facts of life.
I’m determined to make this thing work, but this spinning rock we’re on won’t stop. And I’m here and I’m fierce. So, I guess three of my most important tasks continue to be 1) to be my best, 2) to know my capacity and 3) to give myself what I need. And to be as verbose as I can be about all that shit. I can’t save anyone if I don’t save myself first. I can’t nurture anyone if I don’t first nurture myself.
Related links:
- 10/7/05-3/5/06: Slavery in New York @ The New York Historical Society
- 10/14: ALMA presents Osunlade
- 10/14-15: The Color of Disaster: Race, Class and Hurricane Katrina
- HRLM @ The Studio Museum in Harlem
- New Orleans: to be suckerpunched or to renew, that is the question. Know the difference and feel the flood of emotion.
- Power Dressing @ The Newark Museum
Donald, always be good to yourself, and please bring on more shows whether music mixes or commentary about life. Projecting the energy of the vocalist, Seal, I say “Bring it on!”
do your thing. always.